Tumblr Shiiit, It's Pearlio! ;D

du4ne:

me as a prom dj

"time to slow things down a little blt"

*plays crank dat souja boy (acoustic version)*

(via koala-nipz)

at the resturant with bae

  • waitress: *fills his glass with ice water*
  • me: *watches thot ass waitress pour a lil too much water for my liking*
  • me: you want my man or something?
  • her: wh-wat?
  • me: i'm just trying to figure out why u pour his glass first? im closer? why his water got so much ice?
  • me: I mean the glass already sweating bitch why u think he so dehydrated? im the only bitch who put ice in his glass.
  • me: everybody else got 3 ice square cubes and he got 5 circle ones bitch u think u slick huh? a circle for every minute u gon suck his dick huh? spelling out morris code for u can raw me in ice cubes huh?
  • him: aye calm down
  • me: nah cause she wanna give u 5 ice circles for what? its 72 degrees and mild 1 ice wud have been just fine. bitch gimme a male waiter--matta fact bitch when u get off cause its one too many ice circles and u think fat meat aint greasy

theredbookofwesteros:

quinnfabary:

I think my dad heard me crying cause he just cracked open my door and slid a piece of cake on the floor into my room

 

(Source: potter-weasley, via wellnevertalkagain)


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